I love quotes!

 I cannot count the days I have had spent on my knees that I sincerely felt this way...Sometimes there was too much hurt to have any words.....Luckily Heavenly Father was very aware of that. And me kneeling in prayer, crying, with no words to say was enough. What little faith and energy I had was enough! He knows my pain, he knows my heartache, he knows the times that I have to feel my chest to make sure my heart is still beating, he knows my hurt, my wants, my hopes, and my desires. I am so unbelievable grateful for that!

 This is 150% how I feel! I have no freaking idea how I am still a functionable human being. When your heart hurts so much, and your head can't catch up and make sense of it all....there is no other rational of how you get through it but because of the strength from God and from wonderful family. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I can become a better person from my hardships! I have become more empathetic towards others who have gone through similar things. And if that is something I needed to learn then I will do it. I know that I will continue to see the things I have learned from my trials hope to continual become a better, stronger, person from them. 

Okay I have to admit there have been several days that I have been reduced by it! I let the saddness overwhelm me and I allow Satan to work on me. Make me feel I have no self worth, make me feel that I deserved this, and make me feel that there is no hope or happy ending. I REFUSE to believe it! I know I will be happy someday (even though every time I say that it is still really hard to say). Eventually I can and will sincerely believe it. We have a loving God who wants us happy!

 I absolutely know this. Thank the Heavens above that there is something better ahead! That there are better days ahead that there is happiness ahead, that there is a happy life ahead. One day I finally woke up and had enough self confidence to realize that this does NOT have to be my life. I don't have to live being put down, I don't have to live in a careful, hostile, negative, sad environment. I have the right to be happy! Thank you Heavenly Father for giving me that strength! Even though looking back on it now I can't imagine EVER ever ever doing it again! I am so blessed! And..........The best is yet to be!